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Being a teenager today is much more difficult than
it was even ten years ago.
By Dana C. Hamilton
Being a teenager today is
much more difficult than it was even ten years ago. Being the parent of a teenager is even more
challenging. As the parent of a 7th
grade student I understand the difficulties of speaking to children about the
dangers of underage drinking, drug use and smoking.
It is hard enough to get
my son to wake up and take a shower in the morning let alone discuss an issue
that might be considered awkward. Some
parent’s think that if they don’t discuss issues they will not materialize, or
they will have a chance to talk to their child at a later date.
The truth is that waiting
or avoiding the topic all together is not the answer. Research supports the notion that parents are
still the number one influence in their child’s life regarding the use of
underage drinking, smoking, and drug use.
In the 2006 Kittitas
County Healthy Youth survey, results reported that as youth get older they feel
it is less likely that they could talk with a parent about a personal
problem. As parents we must talk to our
children early and often no matter how uncomfortable the issue is.
It is never too early to
discuss an issue that can have huge consequences in our children’s lives. The best time to start this is when your
child or children are young, and still like you. The hardest time is when they are entering or
in the midst of puberty. The last thing
they want to do is discuss their private lives with people who they don’t think
understand them in the first place.
My husband and I have
always had a very open relationship with our son, and have discussed “touchy”
subjects since he was small. As he has
gotten older we have been able to address issues more in-depth. Last week as I was dropping my son off at the
skate park I noticed an older child smoking.
I was kind of shocked, and I said “hey, watch out, that kid is
smoking.” My son noticed, frowned and
said “Mom, you don’t have to worry.
Smoking is gross.” Unfortunately,
that was not the end of it. I asked
later how the skate park went. He said
that the kid had asked him if he wanted a cigarette. He told me that he said no and skated
away. He said that he felt uncomfortable
and didn’t think he wanted to go back to the skate park for a while This situation was a reminder to me that even
though we discuss things with our children they are still vulnerable to
influence and peer pressure.
Communication with your
child and his or her friends about the dangers of drug and alcohol use is key. Let your child
know what your expectations are about their choices and behavior. Explain to them why you don’t want them to
drink, use drugs or smoke. Believe it or
not, children of all ages care about what their parents think and want their
parents to be proud of them.
Dana Hamilton is a counselor
at
The
Kittitas County Community Network/Drug Free Communities Coalition and the
Community Network agency, through a federal Drug Free Communities grant, are
implementing the “Start Talking Before They Start
Drinking” campaign as a community service for parents. For more information go to
www.kccn-dfc.com.
