Kittitas County Drug Free Communities

Silence isn’t golden. It’s permission.

By Jack Kelleher

It’s probably not just “going to come up,” but a conversation about the risks of drug use has to occur between you and your teen. And since you are the parent, it begins with you. The good news is that with a little practice and a little preparation, you will find it’s a conversation that not only gets easier and easier over time, but one that can also save lives.

TALK EARLY AND OFTEN

Kids are tempted to use alcohol, illicit drugs, and intentionally misuse prescription drugs at much younger ages than you would like to believe. The key is to discuss and agree on boundaries like curfews and choice of friends before negative influences can grab hold. Also, monitor your teens’ activities by checking in and checking up on them. If the rules and restrictions are put in place early, they will be easier to enforce later on.

It is important to talk with your kids about rights and responsibilities, and consequences that go with those rights. Also, talk with your kids about the roles ethics, morals, and values play in making choices.

GET OFF TO A GOOD START

It’s also important to remember that it’s not just whether you talk to your kids about drugs, but how you talk to them about it. It’s a lot easier to break through if you:

Try to set a positive tone
Start with the facts, not judgments
Avoid using accusatory language
Never call them names or label them
Ask questions, and
most of all listen to understand

AND THEN TALK SOME MORE

It’s not going to be a one-time conversation. The key is to keep discussing, keep asking and keep monitoring your teens as they grow up and encounter different situations. And while it might get repetitive and frustrating it will also get easier, more comfortable and inevitably give you and your teen a better understanding of each other. The truth is that kids who learn a lot about the risks of drugs from their parents are up to 50 percent less likely to use drugs. Unfortunately, less than one third of teens actually do get their drug education from their parents and that needs to change.

YOU MATTER

Parents are the most powerful influence on their teens when it comes to alcohol and drug use. Not friends. Not school. You. And it’s up to you to be proactive and use that influence early and often. It’s a conversation that needs to happen so that your teenager knows where you stand on this critical issue. And remember, “What you do speaks so loud that I can not hear what you say.” (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Visit www.kccn-dfc.org for more information, including links to sample conversation starters.

Also, parents are invited to attend a Parent Night event at 7 pm on February 28^th. At this event parents will be provided with information on underage drinking and ways of improving communication with your kids, as well as desserts and a little entertainment brought to you by the band Rhythm Junction. Please call (509) 962-9775 to find out more information and to RSVP.

Jack Kelleher is currently the Co-chair of the Kittitas County Community Network Board. He has worked for years as both a volunteer and professional in the field of drug and alcohol prevention. Jack has worked as a director of a drug and alcohol program, and as a probation and parole officer. He is also a devoted parent to his 19 year old daughter.

The Kittitas County Community Network/Drug Free Communities Coalition and the Community Network agency, through a federal Drug Free Communities grant, are implementing the “Start Talking Before They Start Drinking” campaign as a community service for parents. For more information go to www.kccn-dfc.com.